Another one...

BillMain · Nov 13, 2008

I'D LOVE TO BE EIGHT AGAIN

A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday.
'I'd love to be eight again' she replied.

On the morning of her birthday, he arose early and made her a bowl of Coco Pops and jammy toasties!

He took her to Alton Towers and put her on every ride in the park:
* The Death Slide
* The Wall of Fear
* The Screaming Monster Roller Coaster

Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park.

Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. Right away they went to a McDonalds where her loving husband ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate milkshake.

Then it was off to the movies: the latest Kiddies three hour epic cartoon, a hot dog, popcorn, all the Coke she could drink, her favourite lolly and M&Ms!

What a fabulous adventure!

Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed onto the bed exhausted. He leaned over his precious wife with a big smile and lovingly asked 'Well dear, what was it like being eight again?'

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression changed to one of total realisation...'I meant my dress size, you f***ing tw@t !!!'

The moral of this story: Even when a man is listening, he's still gonna get it wrong.....

Jane Smart · Nov 14, 2008

Good one Bill, thanks for the laugh [

]

Jane x

jamirrorquai · Nov 14, 2008

A family are driving from Edinburgh to Manchester, parents in the front and their son in the back.

They get stuck behind an Anne Summers lorry on the way to Moffat, After a pot hole in the road the back doors of the truck fly open and a huge dildo hits the windscreen.

The mother starts to realise that her son is about to ask seriously embarrisingly questions, so decides to head him off at the pass "did you see that fly, it almost broke the windscreen". "Was is a big fly mummy ?" asked the boy. "Not that big son" came the reply. "Was it a strong fly mummy ?" asked the boy. "Not that strong" came the reply.

"Are you sure it wasn't big or strong mummy ?" asked the boy. "why do you ask" came the reply.

"Cos if it wasn't big or strong, with a cock that size it's no wonder he crased into the windscreen"