New sport

[twinny]

I think I may just have invented a new (potentially Olympic) sport.

The working title is: "I've just carried out an oil change and found the new sump plug washer sitting on the bench!" This will probably need to be shortened a little once the sport is fully developed for ratification by the IOC

Equipment required:
1 x 911 with sump filled with new oil: 1 x sump plug (second one optional): 2 x washer (1 old & 1 new): drip tray (optional): wife's measuring jug (essential).
Objective:
To remove old plug/washer and replace with new washer spilling the least amount of fresh and expensive oil.

Current UK record stands at 1 pint of oil in the jug....a little puddle in the drip tray and an unspecified amount up my arms. The last two items require thought if accurate measurement is to be recorded.

Any ideas for development welcomed. I think I could be on to a winner here.

 

[Richard Savage]

Steve

If yer gona go for gold, the oil has got to reach the armpit. I know, I've been there!

R.

 

[graham tompkins]

[] Are we talking Summer or Winter Olympics here because hot oil is more challenging.

 

[twinny]

Fair point Graham. I believe we may have a cross over sport on our hands here as winter & summer bring different characteristics to the game.

Clearly oil viscosity and temperature have a bearing on the results, we would probably need to calculate flow rates to ensure all year round uniformity.

For the trials I chose winter conditions as this allowed a degree of control, also it just so happened that this was when I did the oil change and made the discovery.

Maybe a handicap system could be developed as one's skill level/ability increased? The better you become the hotter the oil temperature. Also a place for singles, doubles, and mixed doubles. Food for thought indeed.

 

[Richard Savage]

I think we must all be totally outa our trees discussing this. Bring it on, I just love these threads.

R.

PS - Who's gona anti-up for the viscometer then?

 

[tripe]

Ok, Can we consider a new sub group for the event? The new group to be considered for cars whereon the drain plug for the oil tank under the rear wing has firstly been fully burred and secondly has seized in place, therefore cannot be removed.

Participants in this sport need to be able to drain the remote tank by removing the lower oil hose (the thick rubber 'S' shaped one). Anything less than two pints on the floor will put you in a medal position as gravity works to help the oil spurt out horizontally at a near unstoppable rate....

Special sportswear required: One pair of long rubber gauntlets (the type that vets use when helping cows to give birth).

 

[Richard Savage]

But could the gloves not be used for also collecting oil, and thus guarantee that less than two pints of same met the ground, or would that be considered cheating and result in disqualification.

Mmmmmmmmm, there's a lot more to this than meets the eye!

R.

 

[twinny]

Perhaps we could consider introducing a "degree of difficulty factor" like in high and spring board diving.

Clearly Tripe has a very valid point as that setup would have a high difficulty factor applied to it. Now we need somebody who has done "A" level maths in the last 20 years or so to come up with a suitable formula.

The rubber gloves could be suitable modified by a leading sportswear manufacturer to provide a tight fit round the wrist, this should overcome the problem. Indeed the wearing of suitable gloves would allow us to calculate the oil loss more accurately as they could be weighed pre and post event and the difference factored in.

 

[911SSC]

Barking mad

Ian

 

[Siggy]

Sorry but this sounds too easy.


Now blindfolded oil changes []

Dave

 

[Steve Murley]

Twinny,
What you need are 2 of those Lampshade shaped collars that dog owners put round their dogs necks to prevent the dogs biting themselves. (Small Poodle size should do the job), then you could tip the oil out an get an accurate measurement with your measurement jug.


Sorry for clarification, the lampshades need to go one on each arm, ................... don't want anybody suing me if they damage their ears trying to get them on !!!!!

 

[twinny]

Thanks Steve. They would certainly limit the amount of oil reaching the armpits making accurate measuring far easier.

Like the gloves they will probably need a little product development so that they don't adversely restrict movement and/or affect dexterity.

 

[vitesse]

In my view you would all be disqualified for taking the easy option.A much fairer competition would be based on the following method;

Unscrew the drain plug sufficient enough to allow the washer(if it's there) to be removed by cutting it with endcutters.
Then the new washer is similarly cut and after cleaning off any remaining oil.is placed around the plug.Now for the easy bit;with aluminium MIG welding wire in your home welding set you simply have to weld up the split in the washer and dress the weld with the Home Dremel.

All of this is best done blindfold to avoid both weldflashes and dust from the grinding.[8|]

 

[twinny]

I think that could move the sport into the professional arena. However, perhaps we do need both amateur and professional bodies to deal with all aspects of the sport, otherwise we could end up with two different authorities as in rugby, which in turn could lead to conflict if a player wished to move from one to other at some time in the future.

With amateur and professional options you could start off with simple equipment and enter the sport quite cheaply. Once your skill level increased you could turn professional by purchasing a mig welder, gauntlets and goggles, some form of sponsorship may be required at this time though in order to reach the pinnacle of the sport.

 

[tripe]

To spice it up a bit we could include tag teams, mixed doubles or indeed a combination of both. I will go and ask Mrs tripe if she's interested..........[]ouch!

 

[vitesse]

The trouble with going upmarket is the need for regulation.Are we all willing to accept retrained OPC Technicians to officiate at both amateur & Professional level and will there need to be Homolagation rules set to include adequate representation at local,national and world level with even distribution of gender,colour,race and creed?All garages would need to meet DDA requirements and if wifes are to be included,should divorce law be updated?[:-]